Scarborough & Karrinyup, Perth, W.A., Australia
Thursday, 19 April 1990:
Well, my new companion is pretty cool.
I can see we are really going to work well together.
His name is Elder Soloai.
He is a Samoan, originally from New Zealand, but now living in Brisbane.
He’s a really good man; I’m sure I’ll learn a lot from him.
We are teaching this lady, her name is Lisa, plus her ex-com[municated] boyfriend Andrew.
It’s been really choice.
We’ve taught them a First and Second; she’s preparing for the 29th.
That’s not really that fine, but it looks good.
Yesterday we (with Lisa, Andrew) went to a hangi.
It was pretty good; they really seemed to have a good time.
same day, nighttime:
Today I split with Elder [Joseph Scott] Cottis and we went and taught a discussion to this Catholic kid.
It went pretty well.
I really enjoyed teaching the discussion and I really think that it helped out Elder Cottis, because he hasn’t taught very much at all since he’s been here.
Today the new guys came in; they were pretty cool.
We got two new ones in our zone: [the] one in my district is Elder Navlie[?] (or something).
This guy is huge: he is 6' 7" and like 255; simply huge [picture of a barrel-chested guy].
You’ve got to look up to this guy a whole lot.
He’s a Samoan bloke: really humble, nice guy.
Lisa is still good, but she’s starting to ask all sorts of questions, which are quite deep, but her ex-com’d boyfriend keeps trying to answer them, which is scary sometimes, so we’re trying to keep to the basics.
Tuesday, 24 April 1990:
It looks like some time has gone by.
Once again it’s funny how hard it is to write in a journal each night.
I’m really getting along with Elder Soloai.
It’s been really good this last week.
I’ve really enjoyed it.
On Sunday night we had a very special night at 7:00 p.m.
We had a mission Sacrament Meeting.
It was really good.
Apparently it was the first time that this mission has ever had one.
I’d like to remember it as about the most spiritual Sacrament Meeting I’ve ever been to.
Probably the highlight was the fact that I got to pass the sacrament; that was really good.
Yesterday I got some exciting news: my mom and brother James both wrote me a letter in the same envelope.
My brother had some exciting news: he’s getting married; isn’t that incredible?
Her name is Vicky.
She seems like a real nice girl.
James sounded so stoked it was incredible.
I’ve never heard him so happy; it’s really good.
He’s getting hitched on August 8th 10:10 a.m.
Pretty neat, eh?
Also another exciting thing is that my parents are selling their house.
So, who knows? I’ll probably be living in a new place when I go back home.
Not to worry; I’m sure everything will go OK.
I told [the] president about James getting married and he said it will be even better news to hear when I get married (talking to Elder Soloai and me).
He said, “Don’t really rush things, but ‘be anxiously engaged in a good cause.’”
And I really agree with that theory — be looking all the time, but don’t be running around frantically looking for a wife.
It’s really interesting, that next step that’s necessary (marriage).
Kind of exciting, yet scary.
I guess if I just relaxed a bit, I’m sure I’ll be OK.
Wednesday, 25 April 1990:
We taught Lisa and Andrew a Fourth Discussion, Plan of Salvation, Chastity, Word of Wisdom.
It went really well.
In preparation to the discussion they went to a party and so they didn’t want to drink any more because of hangovers.
Lisa shared with us that she, after having four beers, lay on her bed and couldn’t move.
She said it was really wierd.
She also said she believed the “Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery” part, but she needed to think about it.
We’re going by on Friday to teach a Fifth Discussion and they are going to the fireside.
Andrew shared some really interesting things with us today.
He still has his memory of the premortal life and when he was being born.
He could remember the Council In Heaven and how there the third made their choice that they all sort of faded away and we really felt that love for them and really sad, but soon forgot about it.
Also coming down to earth he could remember being in the womb and praying to Heavenly Father and feeling the comfort from Him and still having a lot of the memory with him still.
Then at birth he remembered the surroundings in the room and things like that.
When he told his mom, she freaked: she couldn’t believe it.
Also in the pre-existence he remembers learning who his parents were going to be, then also learning that he would be taught the truth, then turning away from it.
He really has a lot of questions.
Now he’s inquiring how he could get a Patriarchal Blessing, which I referred him to the bishop, because I didn’t know whether he could, because he’s not a member.
Anyway, it’s still good to teach them.
I really had a good peaceful spiritual feeling while teaching the discussions.
It’s funny how quickly you forget all the spiritual things in life.
I hope I continue to have them, so that I can just really continue to gain a massive testimony.
I really have to learn my discussions more.
Friday, 27 April 1990:
Today was great.
I taught three discussions: First, Second, Fifth.
I really enjoyed teaching all day: it was quite draining, though it was good.
Lisa came to the Mission Home Fireside and she finally was able to recognize the Spirit.
I was really happy to hear that.
Anyway, life is good; I had a good day today.
Tomorrow we will start the “Harvesting The Field.”
We’re going to go tracting and give blessings in people’s homes, dedicate their houses, and everything.
It is hopeful that it will be good.
I hope I can prepare myself spiritually for it.
I’ve been feeling at a bit of a loss, but now I’m going to have to lift myself up and do better.
Sunday, 29 April 1990:
Well, the last two days I was able to get up nice and early.
Right now it’s 6:20 and you know getting up is very hard to do in the morning, but I’m really glad that I did, because it really makes me feel good.
Yesterday was quite good in the morning.
I guess I felt a bit slack because all we did was call-backs.
But after a while I started feeling better when we started tracting.
Yesterday’s tracting was really good.
We started this “Harvesting The Field.”
I quite enjoyed it.
In the afternoon we went tracting up at the very top of our area and went and found three homes which we were able to bless.
First was an old lady who had an incredible testimony for prayer.
The other one was a young guy who had broken his arm and then two girls who were living by themselves — probably Born-agains by the sound of it.
They were quite surprised when we blessed their house; it was really good.
It’s interesting: I’m trying to figure out what it is about giving a blessing that’s so hard.
I think that yesterday I wasn’t very confident and I had a hard time thinking about what I could say.
I remember at Vickie and Erin’s house I felt the Spirit very strongly, but I couldn’t understand what I was supposed to say.
Anyway, I got through it.
I’d say that was about [crossed out] the most spiritual experience while tracting.
I really enjoyed it.
Also, another thing: in the past little while: I all of a sudden noticed that I’m not doing a few things that I want to.
I think that right now I should be far ahead of where I am at the moment.
It’s time for me to start maturing rapidly.
I really need to grow up.
I’ve been out 18 months and it’s time I took control of my life.
Also, I need to start producing.
I need to baptize some people.
Where’s that vision I need to catch?
Tuesday, 1 May 1990:
Today was pretty good.
We were able to teach Milton a Second Discussion.
He is very firm to be baptized on the 13th of May.
He even said, “I can’t wait.”
The Spirit was really there strong; it was great.
Today was the start of the “Sons of Mosiah” month.
I’m really excited about getting so much done this month and finally harvesting a few planted seeds.
On Monday night I just couldn’t find the words in my prayers to thank God for having prophets on the earth today.
I tried and tried, but couldn’t express my gratitude.
We watched the General Priesthood Session of Conference with all the missionaries.
It was great.
I haven’t seen Conference for a year; it was so good to see it again. I’ve really enjoyed today.
Last night I saw the Bauers.
They came over from America with me.
They are going home next week, which means that I’ve only got six months left.
It’s really too hard for me to realize that it’s almost over.
I’ve really got to start getting my mind on the time I have now — the present.
I look forward to going home, but I really want to dedicate myself to being here and serving now while I’ve got the choice.
Wednesday, 2 May 1990:
Today was great.
Last Saturday we did “Harvesting the Field” and blessed Bill’s house.
This morning we went back and taught him a First Discussion.
After we were done, he told these two girls to talk to us.
We set up a time to come back and to teach them later today.
One girl said she had her own church, but I think that she will come along.
But we were able to teach Stacy.
Stacy’s 17 years old and has traveled all over Australia.
We figure she’s a street kid, but she’s really spiritual and a good girl.
In the morning we gave her a book.
Later that afternoon when we went back she said she read the first five chapters and liked it more than the Catholic Bible, because she could understand it.
It was more like a story.
Stacy’s scheduled to be baptized on the 13th of May — made my day.
Thursday, 3 May 1990:
Today was another excellent day.
We taught a First while tracting, a Second to a deaf guy named Geoff (he’s getting baptized on the 20th),
a Third to Milton (Bap. on 13th) and a Sixth to Lisa (Bap. on 9th).
All in all it’s been a great day.
We’ve got an awful lot of people that are then waiting to be taught the gospel.
Teaching Lisa was good because Andrew wasn’t there and we were able to open up more.
We really feel it would be best for her to get baptized on the 9th before she goes back to Brisbane, then to England.
I’ve really been able to teach with the Spirit lately like I’ve never done before.
Maybe the desire is there more; I really don’t know.
We’ve been having so much success lately and I’m trying to figure out why the Lord is blessing us so much.
I need to get rid of my selfish attitudes of “look how good I am.”
Lately I’ve been wanting people to notice me and give me praise.
I’ve been concentrating more on the people and how to help them get baptized.
My only hope is that I will really strive hard to get praise of God, rather than praise of men — also look at the investigators and really help them to progress.
I love my mission, especially the last few (2) weeks.
They’ve been the best for a long time.
It’s great.
Baptizing (teaching) missionaries are happy missionaries.
Tuesday, 9[sic.] May 1990:
Man, I hate not writing in the journal.
I feel like I just lost so much of the day.
Well, heaps of things have happened since six days ago.
Milton is firm, also Geoff.
Except Geoff hasn’t received any answers to his prayers.
We haven’t been able to see Stacy.
And Lisa wants to wait till she goes to England to get baptized.
She is praying about it, so hopefully she’ll get the right answer (or should I say, “God’s answer” and not our own human mind’s answer).
Over the weekend we got to see the conference video for the 160[th Annual General] Conference.
It was great.
We went to three of them, plus the Priesthood Session last week.
I really enjoyed it.
I’m so grateful for prophets and Apostles and General Authorities.
They’re great.
I love getting that inspired guidance from them.
On Monday Elder Soloai and myself went and played some squash.
You know, he loves to win and he loves to feel like he’s better than others.
I really like Elder Soloai.
It’s kind of funny to watch how he wants the recognition from others.
Now, I’m not saying this because I lost every game, but it’s just an observation.
Today was good.
I bore some pure testimony about receiving answers to prayers.
I reached my best experience with prayer when I asked God if the Church was true, using the principles in D&C 9:7–9: Study it out then ask.
It was really good.
I enjoyed feeling that feeling of peace as I told the story.
Today was a good day.
Elder [Dal Fatu] Evaga [in Wembley] and I went out today.
We got two call-backs and that’s about it, plus a Second to Jose, a Spanish family, very Catholic and not willing to change.
A Third will be good for them next week.
We’ll have to prepare strongly for it.
I’m still very happy with things.
I’m having trouble with my leadership right now — me being effective — I’m trying to work out.
It’ll come; I’m sure.
Friday, 11 May 1990:
Today was an all-right day.
I didn’t feel that we really worked quite to our potential, although we did accomplish a bit.
We taught Milton a Sixth Discussion and then afterwards he was interviewed for baptism by Elder Orth.
He’s all ready to go for this Sunday.
Everything is cool for him.
It’s pretty exciting to be able to visit with people and see their lives change.
I’ve noticed a great change in my own.
Right now, though, I’m having a bit of trouble figuring out how I can be a more effective leader.
I’ve been feeling kind of inadequate with myself and the way that I’ve been acting.
I just don’t feel like I’m reaching my full potential.
I’m trying to find the happy medium when everything will be going all right.
I don’t suppose it will ever come.
Right now I’m stuck with trying to find the difference between being submissive and taken advantage of.
My companion seems to like to have a lot of glory, especially from high-up people like [the] president.
He also loves to get the glory of our people lower than us.
Maybe I’m just jumping to conclusions.
The last thing that I want is to have some companionship problems — the very last.
I really want to love my companion.
So I’m not going to let little things get at me, because if I do, then I won’t be happy — and I want to be happy.
Anyway that’s how I am now.
Saturday, 12 May 1990:
Today was a pretty good spiritual experience with blessing people’s houses.
Elder Henrison and I went up in Mirabooka and knocked this one door and the father invited us in and we met the whole family and knelt down and had a prayer.
Elder Hernison said the prayer and even remembered all six people’s names.
I was really impressed; it was great.
They are going back next week to teach them a First Discussion.
It should be really good.
We had tea with Lisa and Andrew.
It went really good.
She’s decided that she’s getting baptized in Brisbane.
So, it will take them two weeks to get over there by bike and only three hours by plane.
I hope they can sell their bike so they can fly.
It would be so much better for them.
Anyway, that was my day.
Sunday, 13 May 1990:
Today was good.
It’s Mothers’ Day and today Milton got baptized.
It went really good.
I very much enjoyed it.
Lisa came and Andrew also.
When we did “Harvesting the Field,” we got to bless two different homes.
It was really good.
I did one and Elder Soloai did the other one.
It looks like I caught a cold these last few days.
It looks like today it started to take effect.
I hope it doesn’t stop me from doing anything.
Tuesday, 5 June 1990:
I’m very disgusted with myself for being so slack as not to write in here for so long.
An awful lot has happened in the past few weeks.
The last two weeks I’ve been up at Ballyina back in my old area again.
I really enjoyed it.
I was with Elder [Daniel] McMullan for the two weeks I was there and the whole time he didn’t even really talk to me except when we were talking about concerns that he had.
He just didn’t like me from [the] word “go.”
I suppose I learned a few things.
I learned how much of a jerk I was.
Basically I was really excited about the work — he wasn’t.
I had enthusiasm and wanted to have fun — he didn’t.
I did learn a lot though.
It’s good to hear that James is getting married.
I sure hope Vicky is good to him.
They sent some photos today and they really look happy.
So, I’m really excited for them.
Jonathan is still six feet tall.
He wanted me to tell him how to get to meet this girl he likes named Sarah.
Today was a pretty wasted day.
We had a great leadership mtg this morning.
I took lots of notes and hopefully I’ll be able to now apply what I learned.
The trick to it all is application.
If you can’t apply it, why learn it?
I’ve really grown up the past few weeks.
Thursday, 7 June 1990:
Yesterday morning the Olivers came over to visit.
I was just getting in the shower when they came around.
The Olivers are the mission couple who take care of the flats and make sure they are clean.
So, anyway, I got busted!
They were pretty cool about it though.
The last two days have been hard on me.
I’ve had an awful time keeping my mind on the work.
Tuesday was a wreck.
Wednesday went OK but not that well.
Elder Soloai heard a rumor about me at the New Year’s day activity, when I was in Swan Zone.
It was about me and Sister Edmonds and he’s very clever with getting people to talk about things they don’t really want to (but actually do).
Anyway I told him the story of what happened and now he’s been teasing me about it non-stop.
He’s really a nerd.
But I truly care for him.
Yesterday I heard that Milton has given it all up and decided that it’s all too hard for him.
So, hopefully, we might be able to talk with him and get him back on track.
He might just have a few wrong ideas, like, “I’m not perfect,” etc.
Hopefully things will go OK with that.
I really hope he can get back into [the] Church.
He has the Aaronic Priesthood as well, so that’s pretty rough.
Sunday, 17 June 1990:
Well, halfway through June already!
These last ten days have been pretty good.
I’ve enjoyed them now that I look back.
I’m now in Karrinyup Zone [a Northern suburb of Perth], somewhere where I haven’t been before.
Me and Elder Soloai moved together over here.
I’m still a zone leader.
It’s pretty exciting; no really bad problems as of late.
As I was praying, just then I got the impression that I needed to write in my journal, so here I am, writing.
I suppose the thing that I was thinking about the most was about leadership skills — especially my own.
I’ve learned more about leadership in the last few months than ever before and I get going back to a few attributes:
love; patience; kindness; reproving in private, never in the open; always show an increase in love afterwards.
I have this vision of me being like those men who get up and are the final speaker in Sacrament [Mtg] or give a General Conference talk.
I want to be a powerful speaker.
I want to be able to give a talk to people where they feel like changing their lives.
I suppose the thing that I most need to watch is why I want to be a powerful speaker.
I suppose when I get that straight, I would be all right.
I suppose I’ve been doing most of the things that I’ve been doing for the praise of man.
I more wanted to have people look at me and think, “Wow, what a nifty guy!” instead of “Wow, look at God and how good He is!”
I suppose it will be hard for me to start to think more about glorifying God than myself.
I should look at the passage that was given by the Angel Moroni to the Prophet Joseph Smith before he got the plates.
He said, “…I must have no other object in view in getting the plates but to glorify God, and must not be influenced by any other motive than that of building his kingdom; otherwise I could not get them.” (J[oseph] S[mith] H[istory] 1:46)
That’s what Moroni told Joseph and I feel it is the same thing that the Holy Ghost is telling me at this time.
“Elder Despain, you must not be influenced by any other motive than that of building His kingdom, otherwise you won’t.”
Baptize, speak powerfully, be the kind of leader that you have the potential of becoming.
Anyway, that’s about it.
I’m so grateful to have a loving Heavenly Father, who wants me to improve.
Now I just have to go and apply the things I just learned.
I hope the Holy Ghost helps me remember.
Thursday, 21 June 1990:
Today was pretty exciting.
We decided that we would go on splits today with Elder Rogers and McNair.
I went with Elder McNair to a teaching appointment and it was interesting how John, our investigator, started off with,
“Well, the other day we saw a movie called ‘The Godmakers.’”
So, he gave us some good questions and I told him about how the discussions would help them out a lot and help them to understand exactly what we believe; so that should be good.
We taught them a First again and tried to show “First Vision,” but the TV didn’t work.
So, they said they’d come to church.
I really feel good about John and Lilas.
After that we went tracting and met some good people:
one kid that played grid-iron for a squad over here and wrecked his knee.
Then we saw these kids and were sort of talking to them and starting to help them gain a little bit of faith in God, when this idiot pulled over from his van and came over and went off his skull at us and told these girls that they better not listen to us or else they’d be wasted and started saying we worship the wrong god and that we believe in being eternally pregnant, etc.…
It was pretty exciting.
I’d say it helped the girls like us better after than before and have more trust for us.
And on that same street we got some free cookies — pretty good day.
Friday, 22 June 1990:
Today I went over to the sisters’ place and I certified Sister [Catherine] Lauzé.
It was really tiring.
Oh, did I say that Sister Edmonds is back in the zone again?
In fact, this morning she was feeling pretty sick, so we gave her a blessing.
It kind of reminded me of the time when I gave her a blessing a mile ago and I really felt wierd.
I guess this time it was better because I consecrated [sic., anointed].
I think I did it wrong though.
I’m not sure; I’ll have to find out.
The other day it was really good, because I read in the Book of Mormon about saying prayers before they blessed people.
So now we’ve got scriptural examples to help back that up.
Did I say my knee has been bothering me again?
This is after I played football one week, basketball the next, and so on.
I really thrashed my knee, so I think I’ll go get it checked.
Soon.
I just don’t want to waste time.
I’d like to do it on a Monday, but I’m not sure how I’ll arrange that.
Tomorrow we have zone conferences up in Heathridge.
I’m really looking forward to it.
It really sounds like we have some really good stuff to go through.
I can’t wait.
Sunday, 24 June 1990:
Yesterday was a really good morning.
We had a zone conference and everyone [did] rather well.
I took lots of notes in conference.
Now I’ve got to start setting some goals and stuff like that, so hopefully I start getting somewhere now.
I’m looking forward to the next four months of my mission.
It’s kind of sad: this morning we got up late and it’s 7:15 now.
Church starts at 8:00 a.m., plus, we forgot to get a ride for a family, so we’ll have to take them.
Nighttime:
Today was pretty good.
I enjoyed church and we went to a baptism and a big feed afterwards up in HyghWycome.
It was really good.
President Innis came to both.
We had some good laughs at the barbi; it was cool.
And this evening we went singing to the members; it was pretty good.
I like to go sing to people.
It brings a good spirit into the home.
About ten months ago, when I was serving in South Perth, I met David Gibson ([address here]).
He was later taught the gospel in Fremantle and baptized.
Then today I saw him again.
It was great to talk to him and hear him express his gratitude for the gospel in his life and how great a change it made in his life.
Right now he’s serving as a Stake Young Adult Rep[resentative],
plus, he’s a seminary teacher for the Fourth Ward (Fremantle area),
plus, he’s planning on going on a mission next year — probably next May.
It’s so incredible to see the change that comes into someone’s life.
It’s amazing what the gospel will do for you.
He was telling me of how grateful he was for the gospel and how incredibly happy he was.
I can’t express the joy that I sense when I think of the happiness the gospel brings to people’s lives.
Tuesday, 26 June 1990:
Today was pretty good.
I learned that I need to spend the time on Mondays planning, so that we can have things ready.
We didn’t correlate this week with the assistants, which was all right.
I wanted to talk with [the] president and ask him some questions, like, “How can I make my companionship a better thing and myself be a better leader?” that sort of thing.
Today I went to the doctor and got the results back.
I found out that I have an inflamed knee and some extra fluid.
So he gave me some pills — so I’m taking those.
He also said to stay off my knee.
But the only thing is [is] I need to work.
I suppose I should get a Priesthood blessing.
This evening we went to a Romanian family and visited with them.
It was so cool although the father, who was a member [had] apostatized, because of God’s name (supposed to be Jehovah).
So, anyway, this man and his wife had eleven kids from 16 down to about 2 or 3.
It was so cool, plus, they were all so well-behaved.
Yet, he was a poor man.
I’m sure he was struggling.
I was on the biggest high, I couldn’t believe it.
The children were so cool.
I wanted to have that many children.
But, I think I’ll pass on that.
Maybe if I adopt children or something.
I loved them so much; it was great.
Matthew 18:3 — come as little children.
Matthew 19:14 — of such is the kingdom of God.
Thursday, 28 June 1990:
Yesterday and today we did some splits with our district.
It seemed to go quite well.
There’s just four of us in the flat (and district) and it seems that the others seem to be having some problems.
But they won’t say anything, so we can’t really do anything to help them out.
I was on the bike for the day; it was pretty good.
My blood, it seemed, has thinned out quite a bit, so I froze today — I didn’t take any coat with me.
Tomorrow is Friday and I’m going to Heathridge for the weekend to see if I can help out Elder [David] Bentley.
He’s basically got to find out who he is, so hopefully we can help him.
He’s a great guy, but he’s got some problems that hopefully we can help him through.
I still love kids.
Sunday, 1 July 1990:
Today I had the great opportunity to go into the Primary and share a neat little thought with them.
I still love little kids — they’re great.
I reckon that the best part about little children would have to be their innocence and believing-ness.
These past few days have been good.
I’ve enjoyed being up here in the Heathridge area.
We had a good time teaching a discussion today and really feeling the Spirit.
Saturday, 7 July 1990:
I hate it when I get all caught up in the day that I can’t fit in writing in the journal.
Oh well, it’s been a good week; time is absolutely flying by.
I seriously can’t believe that it’s Saturday once again.
Monday night we watched two movies with the zone: one of them: Dead Poets’ Society. was really good.
I really got into it; loved it.
Tuesday went well; correlation went without a hitch and we team-taught a First.
She’s coming to church tomorrow, so that should be good.
Wednesday was great: I split with this one elder that wasn’t working and took him out for the day.
We tracted from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.
It was great; I loved it.
We didn’t get any success though.
Thursday we went over a Second with Jean.
She had a terrible time with authority.
She just doesn’t believe in religion (Church).
We told her that the Third would answer her questions, so that one will be good.
Now yesterday was exciting.
Elder [Wayne] Huyboom and I went out for the day.
I really had a good time; he’s a great guy.
We parked the car for lunch and as we were eating a lady smashed the right rear end.
We could still drive it around and stuff, but it’s pretty wasted, so right now we’re going around in a smashed-up car.
Today I learned heaps about the Spirit.
I prayed to know whether we should do something and had a “No” — then changed my mind and agreed with God — then got a “Yes.”
It was great; I love it.
Well, some interesting things happening within myself.
I’m going through a bit of a testing period and struggling with different things.
I’m starting to get a bit trunky — now — which is the very last thing that I want to do.
I want to serve the Lord all the way to the end.
I’m starting to think about other things: just little things like singing songs, and watching planes fly overhead, thinking about home, etc., little things that probably don’t matter that much.
But I don’t want to let little things get in the way of my big mission.
I’ve been thinking lately about Sister Edmonds and how great of a person she is and how good of a mom she would make and how much I “think” I love her; stuff like that.
Now that she’s in my zone I get to see her a lot of the time and it gets to be hard.
Like on Monday night: I was really staying away from her that whole night.
Even Elder Soloai noticed how I stayed away from her.
What I’ve decided to do is let her serve her mission without saying anything.
Then, when she gets home, I’ll sent her a letter and go from there.
If nothing happens, then, oh well, no worries.
The only thing I really want, when I get married, is the Lord’s approval of it.
I have to know I’m doing the right thing, and that won’t come till the end of my mission after I’ve been released.
So no sense worying about it now.
So that’s one of the things that’s going on.
Also transfers are coming up.
I wouldn’t mind getting a new companion.
Soloai is starting to drive me nuts.
I’ve been with him for (it will be) three months.
I really love the guy and I’d like to keep in touch with him.
I really love the Polynesians and love to be around them; it’s really good.
Soloai is starting to treat me like I don’t know anything — kind of like I’m a little kid.
Granted, I am a simple person.
I don’t like to be too tense or no one would like me (kind of like a bellyacher).
So anyway, he’s (not on purpose) always making the decisions for everything and trying to pull the “senior companion” thing —
not flat out “I’m senior,” but he just acts like he’s the one with the final word, which is ridiculous.
Although I will admit he wants to make things happen and he doesn’t let the little things stop him from getting along with me, I can sense he is having difficulty as well with me.
So we’ll work it all out.
I love the guy.
Only he does silly things that are hard to cope with.
I want to be the best person I can, and I don’t want this to stop me from progressing.
Tuesday, 10 July 1990:
It always seems like the problems all come at once and they don’t just come one every once in a while.
We’ve got a slack district and a very depressed sister, and a companion who hates his district leader who’s his companion;
and neat things like that; all very fun.
This morning we had a great District Leader and Zone Leader Mtg at the Mission Home.
It was great; I learned a lot.
I took some great notes: there’s a lot of strange feelings that I’ll need to work out.
I didn’t know what they are so I’m going to ask Heavenly Father and ask Him.
I’m sure He will know how to help me.
Wednesday, 11 July 1990:
Well, like I always say, the trick to the principles that we learn is being able to apply them to our lives.
I guess I better learn how to apply them or else I won’t be able to do much.
I think I’ll go over the notes I took and get some info.
We had a pretty good day today and actually enjoyed being with my companion.
This week we are trying to let the people do the work and try not to worry about them too much.
I’m all mixed up again.
The other day I said I was starting to figure things out.
But now I’m back to where I was.
But I am progressing; so that’s good.
Friday, 13 July 1990:
Today was pretty interesting.
Yesterday it rained all morning and so we did some call-backs and tracting later on.
Not much happened.
We went on splits with Heathridge.
I went with Elder McMullan.
It went really well; I enjoyed the time we spent together.
We had a good talk and everything.
Today was exciting.
Not much happened until we got home tonight.
Elder [Bryon] Ilolahia had gone out of his area without permission.
So we had this hunch where he was and called the Williams (a member family).
They at first said he wasn’t there.
But I said it was really urgent.
So Jackie (the daughter) said OK and I told Ilolahia that the permission he wanted, to go to tea with the Williams, was denied.
So when he got home, we had some fun: we had a few wrestles around the flat.
He is a rather short, but huge guy, really strong.
I always throw a few moves on him and beat him.
Well, tonight with an increased fury he took me to the cleaners.
Right now I’m feeling it.
He did some nice head butts and my knees are sore.
The funny thing is, I couldn’t remember any of my moves or at least they didn’t work.
Now everyone is quiet.
But the good thing is, no hard feelings on either side.
Boy, he can be strong; love him though [picture of a heart].
Monday, 16 July 1990:
Today is Monday; some people’s favorite day of the week.
PLAY!
Right now we are going to to play some basketball.
It should be fun.
Yesterday I got the great news of TRANSFERS, and guess what!
I’m going off again.
They told me that I’m going by bus.
So, it looks like I’ll be going country to end off my mission.
All I want to do is just be a plain, ordinary missionary, and the best one I can.
I suppose my service so far has been pretty good.
But I want so much to do better.
I’ve only got 3½ months left.
And I want it to go really well.
This thing for Sister Edmonds has been very strange.
I was thinking this morning whether it was love or lust, why I like her so much.
I haven’t come to any great conclusions yet.
It’s a good thing I can’t do anything about it on my mission.
So I’m just going to just leave it till I get home and see what happens from there.
I promise I won’t do anything about it until I get home, so I’ll be right.
All these wierd feelings that are going through my mind — it’s hard to describe.
It’s so wierd to think that I’ll be going to a new place.
I’m thinking Kalgoorlie, but we’ll see tomorrow. ——
